the collisions of my worlds, it's happening!

keep

curently: 5:35am

got home at 4:28am

left Central Station at 3:10am

got to LKF at 11:50pm

started eating at Sai Kung at 8:40pm

arrived at the #299 bus station in Shatin at 7:52pm

$4 + $9 + $200 + $7.5 + $73 + $8.7

The last $8.7 would've been $100 if it hadn't been for overnight MTR
God I love overnight MTR
ease all worries for a night out:)

I dun wanna wake up this X'mas morning.

I think this should stop.
I didn't even mean it to be known to anyone.
I have no idea why I was unlucky enough to meet anyone during my downs.

I don't even care.
I don't care if you make me wait.
I don't care if you turn me down two hours before our get togethers.
I don't care if you forget me when you are busy.
I don't care if you neglect me.
I don't care!
I know I don't care.

I meant to keep this sudden dark surge all to myself.
I hate being a botherment to others.

I m not even mad at anyone!
I was just yelling at myself.
I was just crying to myself.
I thought texting tones down everything.
I thought I made it clear I didn't know what was wrong with ME
I wasn't saying I was mad at ANYONE!

whenever I find fault, there's only myself to blame.
when do I ever blame it on others?

Have I presented such an irresponsible image to you all these years?

I m fine ok.
If I m so irritating just by putting my depressed mind in words,
I will never do it again.

As for seeing me, I m too good at not showing it on my face.
even after an hour of crying, sitting by my side, no one can tell.

So, if u r going to go on worrying urself
and blaming urself for my problem,
I am never talking again.

Now, can it stop?

Because I know you won't go
Because I know you love me dearly
Because I know I can trust you

You asked to yell at you if needed.
You think my texting is any less than yelling?
You are probably more devastated by that.

Today, they say you are ill.
I say, I made you ill.
coz I passed on my heartache to you.

C'mon.
if I hate you, I wouldn't let you know.
You are just unlucky,
because I love you so much
you are the one to suffer the full impact, head on.

Do you get it?

I must sound like I m yelling at you now
and trying to make you feel better all at once.

Yesterday I knew,
if I went hysteria in front of you,
I will never be able to go to work that night.
Nor would I want to present myself as a mess.
a mess that should stay in toilets.

And person no.2,
I don't know how any of this reached you.
Anyway, if I say what you have guessed is not correct,
I will be lying.
However, I would also be deceiving if I say I break down for that alone.
It's all just bad timing.
one thing leads to another.
Stop apologizing.
and I m fine.
there are other business more important for you to take care of.
I m sorry I weren't aware sooner.
I was all clouded by my own feelings.
Again, I dunno how my little problem came to bother you.

Let this go.
Let's enjoy tomorrow, k?

See what the problem is?

the focus is on the red ball.
yellow balls are fading in the bg.
or yellow balls are overwhelming
and red ball has only itself.

I can never fall sick again.
coz doctors' prescription makes me sleepy
and my self-medication drives me crazy.

and I pray,
coz I hv no idea
how I can get my room (house) clean
in 36hrs!!!!!!

11:49 edit:
I found my lab coat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(wonder if it is still contagious tho...Bromide or rodent blood or...yuck)

0:22 edit:
what is 好味肉?
removing one tenth of my study.
now it's all on my floor, thank you very much.

1:51 edit:
the whole stack of English stuff have (DING!) disappeared
into a big carton box:)
but my floor is still covered by bags bags bags bags bags...
fine, I m a girl.
bags bags bags bags...

1:55 edit:
forgot to add--
who needs presents each year if one is as forgetful as me?
I think I found at least 5 wrapper-open but box-intact gifts in my drawers...
lesson learnt: don't wrap ur presents when giving them to me OR make me use it in front of u

before i go ecstatic about my current free stat:)))

等我講清楚番少少先
我家門外的燒烤area是這樣去的：

路口進我的村

向右拐是我家
向前走再向左拐是一個空地

空地上就有樹同三個方形燒烤爐

不過講明先
1. 我未問彭伯book場，唔肯定有冇架
2. 借左就冇得唔用架，因為費時好似玩隔離屋咁，book左又唔用
3. 我唔知夠唔夠照明設備
4. 要幫忙清場架，費時燒左人家的前園

ok, back to my enthusiasm!!!!

yooyoyoyyo
tho i still hv to go to work in the morning
and still hv tutees to teach
and meetings to attend
but it is the mental burden that matters:)

blissful mood.

went to hv our last dinner of the yr with my master-mates.
tho only 11 of us went.
Tai Yuen is always great.
but then, it was way too many food.
16 dishes, 2 pots of congee and 6 big bottles of beer...(of coz shared)
wing wing day... ha

btw, I was asking thru pulse whether I should throw a party.
coz day after 25 or 26 is still a holiday, so party on these two days would be best for late late late:)

so, I say first ar ha, 23rd, I can only be 80% in coz I have work on 24th morning.

still asking: anybody wants a party on 25th or 26th? (I prefer the latter date)
(thx kihl for showing an interest:))
I m making it a global-friends-I-know-party
and guarantee it will be fun and interesting for all, as long as u play along:)

if I don't get more than 10 replies by the end of this week,
I am getting myself an airticket and getting out of HK, literally!

holiday mood and adrenaline makes me all into being impulsive!!!